XD omfg this is the best ask I have ever gotten.
Ok I have taken some cold medicine and it is kicking in, so let me
drowsily tell you about Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure.
It’s a story about the Joestar bloodline, told from the perspectives of different members of the Joestar family. There are currently 8 parts to this story, and it is ongoing. This started in the 80’s, btw. Ok so! Infodump below, but be warned, I myself know little about it! I hope I can at least get you interested in the anime/manga, or wiki diving!
Part 1: Phantom Blood - the story of Jonathan Joestar, and how his life changed when Dio Brando is adopted into his family. Includes supernatural martial arts and sexy vampires. Also Speedwagon. The fandom tends to love this guy though he plays a minor role.
Part 2: Battle Tendency - In the 1930’s, this story is told from the perspective of Jonathan’s grandson, Joseph Joestar (hello, best Jojo!) and the Pillar Men who awake from their long supposed eternal slumber. Includes more supernatural martial arts, witty one liners, and sexy ancient stripper dudes.
Part 3: Stardust Crusaders (the Friday Jojos) - This tells the story of Jotaro Kujo in the 80’s who goes on a globe trotting quest with grandfather Joseph Joestar and others. Their mission? Get to Egypt, find Dio, and kill him. This is the first part to use the Stands, essentially manifestations of a person’s energy. Think Shaman King but like way better and also the first one to do that sort of thing. Includes ghostly sidekicks named after Tarot cards, witty one liners, sexy everybody, and more sexy vampires. Also steamrollers.
Now those are the parts I’ve watched in the anime (Stardust Crusaders is ongoing and will wrap up in the winter after a fall break), so the next ones are ones I’m just going to describe based on what little I know and what I’m guessing at.
Part 4: Diamond is Unbreakable - Taking place in the late 90’s, Josuke Higashikata uses his Stand to protect his town from some murdering assholes. Also there’s an arrogant mangaka? And a dude named Kira who wants to something something murder people? Hmm…why does that sound familiar? Anyway, features more Stands, now named after musicians or songs, pompadours you should never make fun of, and arrogant mangakas.
Part 5: Vento Aureo (Golden Wind) - Taking place presumably around the same time as Diamond is Unbreakable (I think?), this story follows the son of Dio, named Giorno Giovana. (It’s not delivery, it’s DioGiorno. HA!) Anyway, something something he wants to be a king of the
pirates mafia. (Dreamin, don’t give it up Giorno?). This one is an Italian sausage fest, I think. Also, the main villain is named after a pasta or sauce or something. And there’s a character I cannot believe is a boy, mostly because wow this part is a sausage fest why is there another guy? Anyway he has a toy looking airplane Stand it’s cute. It’s called Aerosmith. I don’t even care, that’s already my favorite character. Anyway, mafia sausage fest shenanigans I guess. Includes more music stands, sexy Italian men, more homoeroticism than ever before, and pasta saucy villains. Or something.
Part 6: Stone Ocean - Ok so I think this one is close to the modern day (2010’s) and from what I hear it’s pretty much one of the best parts. Also first female Jojo, YAY! This is the story of Jotaro’s daughter Jolyne. And it starts with her in prison. Whoops. Anyway, she gets a Stand (you get a Stand! And you get a Stand! And your kids get a Stand!) somehow and shenanigans happen. Something happens and Jotaro gets fucked up so she has to something save him. Also she gets a hot female sidekick and like two hot male sidekicks, but I’m already laughing at them cause one has footprints all over his outfit and the other is named fucking Weather Report. WEATHER REPORT! anyway, something something to do with Dio as well. Includes boss ass women, hilariously named men, and a creepy pedo-looking priest as the antagonist. Also, something something this leads to the next part somehow?
Part 7: Steel Ball Run - set…sometime, I don’t even know, in an alternate universe (what?) Johnny Joestar (I get it) and his friend Gyro Zeppeli race horses. and that’s about all I know. Wait, ok I know just a little more. There’s a Dio in this universe too. He’s a dinosaur on the inside, where it counts. Coincidentally he’s also a dinosaur on the outside. Also the president of the US is named Funny Valentine? Also no one knows what D4C stands for? Includes paraplegic heroes, horse racing, funny Valentines, and a fucking dinosaur.
Part 8: Jojolion - I know nothing about this one. Really. I don’t. Not a thing.
…the Jojo of this part has 4 balls. That’s all I know.
and THAT’s what Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure is about! Any questions?
Was it ever explained how Joseph knew exactly what a lot of his opponents were gonna say, or is it just simply being really good at analyzing a person’s personality and patterns of speech?
…I need to hurry up and read Battle Tendency. Still in Phantom Blood. The manga probably has the answer doesn’t it? Cause I don’t remember anything being said about it in the anime.